Sunday, 30 November 2008

Privacy and thigh-high boots


Since I went public with my romance-filled rendez-vous with Chris R., I have received a couple of concerned comments from my close friends and family regarding privacy. When I first became interested in blogging, I spent a lot of time evaluating the levels of openness I would be willing or able to excercise in public. I was worried about hate-mail, and I was concerned about people getting under my skin.

At first I thought that if I posted pictures where my face was not clearly visible, I would be safe from all potential harm. Later on I adopted (or I thought I did) a way of writing that did not reveal much about my personality. After I had been blogging for a couple of months, my close friends and family told me that even without a lot of actual personal content, my blog was very much about myself, and it very clearly pointed out to my readers who I was.

Regarding my newly found happiness with Chris R., I have started wondering why it is such a taboo in my country to express one's happiness in public. I almost sense confusion on top of everything else from a lot of people when they become face to face with another person's happiness. I wonder why it is more acceptable to complain openly about one's life in public, than to say that one is content? Are we letting fear dictate our lives because we are so scared of jinxing things? Or is happiness somehow better if you keep it to yourself? Perhaps the success of reality-tv, gossip magazines, online diaries and blogs is a sign of us craving to get close to other people and their lives, and yet we are still obsessed with hiding ourselves instead of showing.


I want to thank everyone for posting such positive comments in my comments section, and I also want to thank my close friends and family for caring about me and my happiness, and for wanting to protect me. In the meantime I will keep writing about things I feel like writing about, and I will not worry too much about jinxing happiness by being open about it.

8 comments:

muija said...

I totally agree with you on what you wrote about the finnish mentality towards people being open and happy. I've only lived in Finland for a few years (and recently moved "abroad" again), but it never seizes to amaze me how bitter and jealous people seem to be about other people's happiness. If you smile on the street people either think you're an idiot or grimace back to you. Very depressing. Good for you and all other open-minded finns who dare to defy the constant misery. I'm happy for your new found happiness, btw. You go, girl! (That's also something they never do in FIN; encouraging positive feelings & behavior) Good post!

Chris R. said...

Wow, great post, Waves...you write beautifully. Fortunately, and clearly! :), I prefer to trumpet our happiness from the highest towers...you are a wonderful human being, and I have never been so happy, or felt so blessed. :) Chris R.

Eyeliah @ stylesymmetry.com said...

I remember when the internet first came out and it seemed to be basically chat rooms. it seemed scary at the time, who is this person I am typing with. Now we put real names and faces which is more honest, sometimes you have to trust your gut and just go for it. I am happy for you. :-) And for the record, I believe happiness becomes even better when shared.

Anonymous said...

congratulations, waves :) may happiness be yours always! :)

happiness should be shared, we should learn to be happy for others too :) so keep blogging!

Milla said...

Oh privacy schimacy! While I understand your parent's and loved one's concern, Finland is a small country after all, thus making a blogger a little more recognisable to her reader than in most countries (I saw you at my work about a month ago, for instance;), but it's lovely to see you happy. No blogger, in my opinion, can totally distance their personality from their blog. That's what's interesting thing about blogs, your persona, your life, your interests, and now your happiness too! So congrats!

Milla said...

wow. I make a lot of grammatical mistakes;P

Karima said...

even though i don't know you, it made me happy to read (and see) that you are happy! how much you reveals is really your own decision - and sharing joy definately beats public moaning!

purrhaps said...

cool proportions)