What I wore today

On feeling guilty

I have bought many clothes in the past couple of weeks. They are certainly things I do not need, but have wanted to have anyway. I don't know if I have been trying to combat some kind of a spiritual void with all this shopping, but let me tell you, if there is a void I need to fill, it sure ain't happening with a bunch of new clothes, because the more I buy, the more I want.

I don't actually even know why I feel so guilty about all this shopping. Sure, a lot of money has been spent on all sorts of random things, but it is not like I am bankcrupt. Maybe it is about a guilty conscience, that one should not award oneself with too many material goods if one hasn't somehow "earned" them, or maybe it is the influence of certain people in my life at various times who have been very careful with the way they spend money and the type of material possessions they invest in.

When I spend money on clothes, or even if I get them for free, it is a guilty pleasure. But why? Would I be a better person if I didn't have this many clothes? At what point did I start thinking that the material world is, or should be, somehow below me? Perhaps it is the same ancient pattern that connects men with reason and knowledge, and women with emotion and instinct. One doesn't need to be a rocket scientist to figure out why it is the women that feel guilty for buying a new pair of shoes, and not the men for spending a fortune on a new car. (And no, it is not about not needing the shoes but needing the car.)

The key word to everything around us is power: the power we have over ourselves and others, or even more so, the power someone else has, or has had, over us. I have had power over myself for a long time, but I still haven't learned to use it. I don't recognise it. I hide behind other people's perceptions, and act or feel accordingly. It is not that I, myself, feel guilty about the shopping, it is thinking what other people think that makes me feel ashamed. Perhaps recognising this and truly understanding the meaning of it will be a step towards something new and palpable in my life.

How great is it to have cats, in the midst of all this consumer confusion? All I have to do is to look at Illusia sleeping like this, and my mind is free of a big bunch of nonsense I think about all day long.

Ought to go on strike

I need to stop shopping like a mad woman. I actually made a serious effort to go on shopping strike for real last week. In order to create a good source of motivation (as if spending way too much money wasn't enough), I suggested a bet to a friend. I will spare you the details of the stupid affair, but there we were, a couple of days later, arguing our butts off over the stupid bet and its consequences. Well, to be totally honest, I did most of the arguing, but there it is. Needless to say, the conditions of the bet were not exactly defined, nor did I think beforehand that the whole thing could turn into a big mess and actually pose a threat to our friendship. Well, one thing led to another, my friend lost the bet on purpose, I got angry and lost my effort levels, and bought shoes to make myself feel better.

Well, they are great shoes, and I do feel better now. The shoes are so pretty, plus me and my friend seem to be on speaking terms again. I also got this dress:

This dress will go for any occasion just as it is, with either flats or heels, dressed up or down, but I also I think it will look great in the winter too, with black tights, a long-sleeved t-shirt underneath, and a pair of fabulous high-heeled boots.

This is what I wore today:

I love the way Masa is casually hanging out like this in the living room, with his front paws tucked under his chest.

The vagabond experience

Well, I am back. My laptop is still not fixed, but I am borrowing my sister's, and should be able to have it at my disposal until my own is doing better. It feels strange to write after such a long break. I feel that a lot of things have happened even though my life is pretty much the same as usual. It is that part of summer, I guess, which makes one want to jump out of one's skin and go crazy. You know, to just do things for the sake of doing, not caring what other people think.

I am not awfully outspoken or spontaneous, and can be thought of as a private person, actually. This is why having these strange, live-in-the-moment feelings is even more meaninful to me. At times like these I let go of an inner burden I carry around me for most of the year, and just act. They can be small things, meaningless things, or it can be about talking about my deepest feelings and fears to someone who doesn't expect it. The reactions of the people around me are not always positive, and sometimes I get no reactions at all, but I have to be true to my inner self.

Today, as I was at work, feeling tired and bored, a street artist (a juggler) came round to entertain a bunch of people on the street I work by. For whatever reason, I was fascinated by this guy, and after I was done with work, I went over to him and asked him if he would join me for ice cream. He was a bit weirded out, but said yes, and off we went, me and this total stranger and his three dogs, off to the seashore to have ice cream. We spoke of animals, of travelling (he is a vagabond, of Italian origin), of languages, people, the mafia, extreme sports, shopping, you name it. It was such an uplifting experience to just talk and hang out with a stranger that it doesn't bother me one bit that I will never see him again.

These silver shoes are my new favourites, I have worn them almost every day now. I bought them to replace the pale pink ballet pumps I wore to bits. I wore the outfit with the beanie two days ago, and the one above today.

Laptopless

I am hoping to get my computer fixed by the end of this week. There are so many things I have wanted to write about during this past week, and it has been (and still is) awfully frustrating to not be able to post anything! Stay tuned, I will be back soon!

Suburban shopping

Me and my sister spent forever at our local suburban shopping centre, and on our way home came to the conclusion that there is no reason to go to the centre of Helsinki to find nice new clothes. For example, we made some great discoveries while shopping at Anttila, the Finnish equivalent of Target. This blue cotton & silk mix dress was my personal favourite:

My sister's red & white dress was free, because we bought three sale items. (Buy two, take three!)

Her jacket was reduced 60%, and it cost about 22 euros! We ended up strolling around the shopping centre, went to all sorts of stores we wouldn't normally go into, and had a great day.

I am not much of a jeans wearer, but I go through phases when I practically speaking live in jeans. Earlier this year I sold my old jeans at the flea market, and have been looking for a good pair ever since to replace some old ones that I have worn to shreads. I have found two great pairs this past week:

These ones are by Denimbirds.

These are by Crocker. By the way, their website features some of the most repulsing, cheap and degrading advertising images (featuring Carmen Electra) I have seen in a long time. My jeans are wonderful though.

I found this old scarf at the flea market:

And this is what I wore today:

Trouble, oh trouble; loveliness, oh loveliness

The reason why I have not been able to post anything since last Wednesday is my laptop. The silly thing has decided that it doesn't want to start up at all. Ugh, I hate technology! There are things I really should (and want to) write about, such as two blog awards I have received recently (thank you, laura, and esme and the lane way!) as well as doing some work on my comments section, but I hope you will forgive me for postponing those right now. I am at my sister's computer, in a bit of a hurry, and want to show you a couple of new things.

I really don't like Gina Tricot. It is one of those clothing stores that make me agitated and nervous the minute I walk in, and I wonder why I even bother going in. The music they play is really awful, and way too loud. The store is full of teenagers giving me the evil eye, because I am obviously too old to be shopping there. Well, I haven't really bought anything at Gina Tricot, before this past week. I found this dress at the sale rack, because it had some make-up stains on it. (By the way, this make-up issue is something I have never quite understood. Why is it so difficult to try on a piece of clothing without wiping your face on it?) Anyway, this is the dress:

I imagine the inspiration behind the dress is every fashion blogger's favourite, the Miu Miu s/s2008 collection. The cut on the top part is lovely, but a bit too bold for my liking (and for my small bosom). I figured I could wear it with a t-shirt underneath. I am sure the regulars at Gina Tricot would wear the dress with a silicone strap bra, black leggings and 1980s style white patent pumps, but oh well, I don't do any of those things.

I went to check out the H&M final sale earlier this week. When the Marimekko collection for H&M came out this spring/summer, there was one item I wanted, and couldn't find. I was in luck this week though, because I found what I wanted, and it had a -70% tag on it! The piece in question was this swimsuit:

The colour or the pattern isn't exactly something I would normally go for, but the cut is to die for!

This is what I wore today:

The hair band is from Glitter, it was -50%. I also got a burgundy red one, as well as an ivory one with a different kind of flower attached to it. I wore the latter last night when I went out, and a very drunken man in an ill-fitting suit asked me if I was having my bachelorette party. As if a girl couldn't wear a flower in her hair otherwise!

[I hope to get my laptop fixed as soon as possible. Before that happens, I am having to rely on my sister's computer and I will not necessarily be able to post as often as I would want to. Sorry, folks!]

The short of it, part 2

I bought these high-waisted denim shorts at the Noa Noa sale. I am not a huge fan of shorts in general, but these ones were too good to pass. After seeing this photo, I realised that I must throw away my pale pink (now gray) ballet flats. It is funny how it goes: I have about 70 pairs of shoes, and I always end up wearing the cheapest pairs to bits (these ones in question were 10,90, from H&M), while the beautiful, high-heeled, expensive pairs lay in my closets, untouched.

I found this old photo album at the flea market this past Sunday:

I also got these plates to hang up on my wall.

It can't be, can it..?

Since when have luxury labels been counterfeited? How does one recognise a fake? These questions have been going through my mind for the past two hours. You see, I found this at an antique store:

The store in question is a tiny suburban antique store, run by two elderly people who have a huge selection of old record players, lamp shades, art, china, jewellery, books... all sorts of stuff, not that many clothes though, just a couple of really old vintage dresses here and there.

I saw this belt on an upper shelf, where it had been positioned next to a wonderful vintage hat (of which more later). I looked for the store owners if they could tell me the belt's story (they always tell you where the items are from etc), but they were not there today, and there was some other lady at the till. The belt didn't have a price tag on it, so I approached the lady at the till, who was seemingly annoyed that she had to come up with the prices for "all these random items that the owners haven't priced yet". She didn't really even look at the belt and just said "well, you can have it for 5 euros."

It's not like this store is the type of place that would put fake items up for sale, but I still have doubts if this could be the real thing. The leather is genuine patent and the slightly worn buckle weighs about half a kilo (no kidding). The stiching on the leather looks old but immaculate. The reverse side of the belt has no markings whatsoever. If it is real, the lady at the till certainly didn't know what she was selling, but if she knew (or thought) it was fake, she probably would have at least given me the usual "I don't know the belt's origin, it might be real, might be fake"-story. So, are there any vintage Chanel specialists out there? Could this be real?

This is the vintage hat I was talking about. It's not exactly my colour, but I love the shape and the feather detail at the back.

I also found this dress at the flea market. A bit Hyacinth Bucket, but who cares.